Spam Thread Mk. III

I demand a sacrifice.

 

hey 997 posts
Post Merge: [time]1292376052[/time]

 

Needs more Leonardo with a jamaican accent.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P-EKQp4Hedk&feature=grec_index

 

"Sparkles," Bella cooed, gently brushing Edward's hair back, "I want to fuck myself with a sword."
Edward focused on the setting sun. He refused to return Bella's glare.
"Again?" He whispered. "You still haven't found the last one."
Bella's eyes darted down in shame. Edward finally turned and faced her. He placed his strong, sparkling arms on her shoulders and pressed down firmly. Bella felt paralyzed.
"This is what it must feel like to be raped", she thought frantically. Edward suddenly seemed to grow in size, hulking over her petite figure, his eyes glowing in the twilight.
However, as the pain was starting to numb her entire body he released her. His head pricked up.
"Bella, did you hear that?"
"What, Edward?"
"Did you hear that?"
A soft sound, whispering like the wind, seemed to dance past their ears. Bella tried to follow it with her eyes, but the movement was so fleeting all she managed to do was make it look like she had ADHD.
"Kitchen" he murmured, with a confused look on his face.
"What?"
Suddenly, Edward let out a yelp, and it seemed to play in slow motion for poor Bella.
Edward grasped at the wooden stake that had pierced his heart from behind.
"I will take you with me, Bella!" He screamed, grasping onto her throat. He started to squeeze as Bella weakly attempted to pull his hands away.
But just as soon as she started to lose consciousness, Edward's hands started melting away. Bella collapsed, coughing and spluttering on the ground as Edward turned into soup and was absorbed into the ground.
She looked up, and a lone figure stood above her. She didn't know whether to be grateful or angered.
"You... why?" she inquired after a long stare.
"This scene was starting to piss me off," he said, producing a pipe, "You bitches should have stayed in the kitchen."

And with that, Van Helsing walked off into the burgeoning night, satisfied he had finally ended the madness.

 

tee ell dee arr.

 

SWEET.

 

FINALLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

A "C" is just asking to be disowned in Japan.

 

At least I BEAT it. You wouldn't believe how hard it was.

 

at first I thought you were another twilight fan until I read the whole thing. best...story....ever...

 

absolutly best this ever read

 

Looking over it again, I've made a few errors. Pretty bad ones; "Bella collapsed, coughing and spluttering on the ground as Edward turned into soup and was absorbed into the ground."

I guess "soil" would have been a better replacement.

Also, cunnilingus.

 

lol

 

CAWFF CAWFF

 

Rajon Rondo I know your black ass is reading this, stop dishing 14 assists a night. Damn.

 

Hey guys, I just discovered one of the biggest bumps in RomU.

 

Fail XD

 

LOL

Boston Celtics!

don't tell him to stop that which he simply just can't do!

 

wow just wow

 

You know I was certain that this thread had hit 5084 last time I was here.