Scenario Solutions!

Not panic of course!
BACK-UPS, MUCH?

A wild Pedobear appeared!
@ @
v^v^ LV R@P3
-|-
/\

o LV 3.14159265
-|- Dude(ette?)
/\
---------------------------------
| | |
| FIGHT | KILLING SPREE |
|____________|______________|
| | |
| PEE PANTIES | RUN & SCREAM |
|____________|______________|

Choose Fight:
---------------------------------
| | |
| Call 911 | Call ESRB |
|____________|______________|
| | |
| Call Mommy! | Judo CHOP! |
|____________|______________|

Choose Killing Spree:
---------------------------------
| | |
| Machete |Rocket Launcher|
|____________|______________|
| | |
|Bear Trap+6yo| Dual Handgun |
|____________|______________|
Choose Pee Panties:
---------------------------------
| |
| Oh No! Pedobear likes that stuff!|
| v|
---------------------------------
---------------------------------
| |
| Raped. Dude(ette?) Blacked out.|
| |
---------------------------------
Choose Run & Scream:
---------------------------------
| |
| Dude(ette?) run and screamed |
| successfully! v|
---------------------------------
10 seconds later...

A gang of wild Pedobear appeared!
@ @ | @ @ | @ @ | @ @ | LV. /\/\3G@ R@P3
v^v^ | v^v^ | v^v^ | v^v^ | LV. /\/\3G@ R@P3
-|- | -|- | -|- | -|- | LV. /\/\3G@ R@P3
/\ | /\ | /\ | /\ | LV. /\/\3G@ R@P3
---------------------------------

 

charge $10 bucks a head


you have to kill some uber powerful demon/monster thing and an elder says thats dangerous so he gives you a choice between a kitten and a computer to bring with you, which do you pick and why?

 

The kitten, I'll need a distraction for the demon/monster

What would you do if the ninjas with steamrollers were out to get you?

 

jump on my steamroller cause i am i ninja

you find out that mega space pineapples are invading earth do you:
a)run like hell
b)fight and get pwned
c)sacrifice half of the inhabits of earth so you can be spared
d)become there pet
e) {insert answer here}

 

e) Fart.

You're hungry.
You:

 

eat....then throw up..then get hingry..then throw up..then eat....and so on.....

seph and kefka is fighting!!!
youve gotto stop them!!what do you do?

 

Use your buster sword and Deal an Omni-slash and own both of them at the same time with 9999 damage per hit.

Scenario:

You can't cast magic, there's no fire, phones, electricity (So no electrical devices), no energy sources of any kind. There's nobody around and no teleporters. You're in a desert at night with no clothes. It's cold, so doing nothing means you'll freeze to death. Do you:

a) Jog through the desert in any given direction and try to keep warm that way and hope you come to civilisation.
b) Sit and whine and huddle up at your impending death due to the cold and then be eaten by coyotee's in the morning.
c) Bury yourself under the sand and try to keep warm that way.