Modifying your babies

It seems that as we progress we're beginning to finally give babies and children the respect they deserve as human beings with feelings and rights as opposed to treating them like property or pets. Spanking is much less popular as people are starting to realize it's inappropriate to physically assault anyone, even your own children, if you don't like their behaviour. RIC - routine infant circumcision - is also rapidly losing popularity as people are understanding the medical function of foreskin as well as how to care for it and how silly the social stigma around intact males is.

So as far as we've come, I still find it highly offensive when I see a baby with pierced ears. I can't believe how common it is, even among people I know, to actually take your infant and have their flesh literally pierced through and decorated with jewelery and for what? I get dressing your kids up in clothes you like, like pretty dresses on girls. My son has a million printed tees, mostly with superhero or videogame pics because...well...I like comics and videogames. But to actually do something to physically alter my child for my own amusement is tantamount to abuse as far as I'm concerned. Not only does ear piercing hurt, but when they do children and babies, they almost always use the gun, and knowing a thing or two about piercing through people in the industry, frankly, even adults should never use that thing. It punctures far more skin, is far less sterile and has a way higher rate of infection and keloids than the needle.

I find it disturbing that anyone would think it's appropriate to pierce their baby's flesh for decorative purposes when the child can't even make an informed decision about what's happening to their own body. People are accepting more and more than circumcision is more of a cosmetic surgery than medical (thus the huge decline in the procedure), so why are people still having their babies ears pierced when it's so clearly nothing short of a painful, body-altering, even risky venture for nothing more than decoration??

What next? Baby tattoos?

Thoughts?

 

RIC, I have a few reasons why males traditionally circumsize their foreskin, for
I underwent this procedure at age fourteen. First, it prevents the build up of pus around the area as well as for hygiene purposes only and when males take a leak they have to hold it so it does not become a loose cannon every time we use the bathroom. I assume those who are not circumsized have to clean up after themselves constantly because...it's just sanitary that way.

However a child from birth is known as a dependent under the guidance of their parent. The parent is fully responsible for their own actions. And well sometimes those parents take it a little too extreme to alter another humans body without full acknowledgement, the child would really not have full control. In some cultures it would seem appropiate, but a baby or child getting pierced through similar methods of alteration should at least get their opinions heard before parents pressure them to do so.

Yeah and next thing we know is that people start branding each other with a logo or something. I think it's just wrong for babies to get alterations at such a young age, just wait until they turn into adults.

 

Yay spanking!

 

Breakdown of society? That's a bit dramatic. Also, kids are only out of control because of their parents. It's the parents who teach, or fail to teach their kids proper manners. I was raised to give respect to any and all adults and their property. You can't just group all kids into one group of disobedient yobs, because they aren't all as you seem to see them.

 

It's not because kids aren't getting beaten the way they used to in the past that they are out of control. It's because kids are being raised in an environment where they learn to feel they're entitled to certain luxuries no kids expected in the past and that's the parents responsibility. Kids who are disciplined physically grow up more aggressive than their counterparts. Sure, they may be to afraid to act out with their parents because they don't want o be hit, but then they grow up with all that pain and frustration and that feeling of helplessness and take it out on the people arond them. Kids should learn to respect other people's space and bodies...how can they learn that when their own parents resort to hitting? And as a parent, how can you justify hitting a child? Someone who can't possibly defend themselves? Someone you are supposed to protect? It's not something I will every understand.

As for circumcision, just as a female has to leanr how to take care of her genitals (rather than having her labia chopped off in the name of "cleanliness"), any intact male is capable of taking care of his penis without it becoming infected. But, just as girls can get infections (and frequently do) so can boys, and yes, intact boys get infections slightly more often than circumcised ones, but it can be treated like any infection. Unfortunately many parents aren't properly educated about their intact sons and do things like forcing back foreskin before it has detached, thus CAUSING infections, and doctors who like to make easy money and who have no morals like to basically trick parents into thinking the procedure is necisarry.

The fact is, the foreskin serves a purpose, protecting the glans and holding thousands of nerve endings. Removing it takes away that protection, those nerve endings and oh yeah, is incredibly painful and traumatizing to a newborn infant. My son is intact and has never had a single issue. Keeping him clean as a baby was WAAAAY easier than if he had some knarly, open wound on his penis, in his diaper, right next to where feces ends up. And if he ever does have an issue I will take every single avenue available to me before ever considering a circumcision.

It baffles me how girls can get infections all the time (I know moms with girls who are ALWAYS getting urinary tract infections and and stuff...it's more common in girls) and no one every suggest lopping off body parts, but with boys the first instinct seems to be to remove perfectly healthy tissue. Wtf?

 

no it's true! In Scotland if a kid said his mother used to slap him, they would contact their guardian and maybe remove the child from them.

 

You can say whatever you want in retrospect, but when you were a CHILD, before you were able to discern what the reasons might be or the long term effects, all you - or any child - knows is that the people you expect to protect you from hard are inflicting physical pain on you.

As parents we have to teach our children the ways of the world and yes, boundaries. In the real world, boundaries also include not physically assaulting people. As an adult, if you disagree with a coworker or friend or someone in general pisses you off, your first instinct shouldn't be to hit them. Kids should be taught that conflict can be resolved without physical violence, not the exact opposite.

 

I was spanked (and beaten) repeatedly when I was a kid. And not even just because I was disobedient; just getting a C on an exam would be enough to warrant 4 strong lashes from my mom's belt. This went on until I was 13 - yes thirteen!

I lived in a pretty sheltered life when I was a kid. Most of the stuff about the world, I learned from watching TV when they (older relatives and my mom) were watching the news, and even then most of the stuff went past my head. My family were the ones who taught me to never trust strangers, and always respect your elders.

So, what do you think happened to me? I'm absolutely fine. I might even say I'm calmer and more in control of my feelings than most "non-spanked" teens my age.

I can't talk on behalf of other families who spank but I can say this, whenever I was spanked I was ALWAYS told WHY I got spanked. Whether it was because I was acting out, I said a "bad word", or when I got a C on an exam (their reason was that I "can do better than this!"). And it made me double think my actions from then on.

Like I said, I'm probably one of the most in control and calmest of the kids my age. I NEVER got in any fights growing up and always talked my way out of everything. And this was when the "in thing" sometimes was showing off who was the toughest, most macho, etc.

 

@2DamCerius:
Eww, you get a build up of pus around your foreskin? I have mine, and I've never had any build up of anything. I think most "intact" people you ask will say the same. Then again, who would admit to having a pus filled foreskin? As for taking a leak, the few times I have pissed with it pulled back (I dunno why, just wanted to try it I guess) it kinda sprays in pretty in-direct way. But normally, it's a perfectly smooth, steady stream that's perfectly easy to aim. I never have had to "clean up" after myself.

@Loony:
Christ! What newspaper do you read? The Sun or the Daily Mail? ;D
But seriously, that seems a bit over the top, don't you think? Yeah, sure the recent riots were ridiculous, but in general most young people I know (myself being 20) aren't yobs, hooligans, or anything like that. They're all quite nice really!

@Toffee:
I was never spanked, slapped, or anything else, and I've never been in a fight once. I did reasonably well at school, and when I didn't, my parents supported me, but had a talk about why (usually a stern one because they knew I could do better). This seemed to work fine for me. I'm not saying you're wrong, but you can't say "people who aren't smacked are violent" (just how you can't say "people who are smacked are violent"). If you know why you're being punished, and as long as the smack isn't due to anger and is not actually harmful, but merely unpleasant, then I can see certain situations where a smack could be appropriate (I think I never really did anything to warrant this, hence not being smacked). But no-one should ever strike anyone, especially a child, out of anger. And no-one should ever actually hurt a child.

Now, as for peircings etc, I feel horrible every time I see a toddler, or even a young child with peirced ears. It does actually make me feel physically shocked and a little ill if I think about it.

 

Not hurt? hah! I actually bled one time because she used the buckle part of the belt!

And before you guys start going off on how she's a terrible person, I also have to mention that when she saw the blood she immediately cleaned it, put a band-aid on it, kissed it, and said she was sorry.

 

Damn, toffee, I'm...sorry about what happened to you as a child. I'm glad you turned out okay but what happened to you wasn't.

 

i just saw kid yelling at their mother the other day for not buying the toy she wants.... back then if i act that way i would get slap in the month for having no respect.

if this continues, we will have a new generation of people that have no respect for the elders.... who am i kidding, we already living in that generation.... we already have people sending thier gandparent to "retirement house" because they are too busy taking care of them (do you remember how they used to take care of you back then when you are a helpless babies?)

some people do it for religion.... Jew circumcise thier infant (i been told), Muslim boy get circumcise at 12 (they call it sunat, apparently is a path way of boy become a man) and Hindu get piercing for their child (both boys and girls).

big deal, my mom broke my legs once for stealing from a rich kid, if she didnt i would have become a thief right now.... and she shouldnt apologized for disciplining you.... she did said its that behavior is wrong afterall and you didnt listen....

 

She broke your legs?!

 

@calvin_0 First of all, that's messed up. I really hope all these people here who were abused by their parents don't intend to do the same with their own children. You can raise perfectly respectful, well-behaved children without ever laying a hand on them. Hitting is what lazy, undisciplined parents do because they don't know how to parent properly. I don't mean to insult anyone's parents here, but it's shameful to inflict physical harm to a small child, I don't care if you preface it with explanations or end it with apologies. It's not right.

Also, as far as altering your children for religious purposes, they don't get a free pass in my book either. There are a lot of "religious practices" we don't allow in our society because we've deemed them barbaric, including many forms of body mutilation. My hope is that both RIC and piercing goes down that road as well. There are some things a civilized people should never do - cutting off bits of babies and children or putting holes in them should be on that list.

 

Spanking is hardly physical harm. Just a sting that fades away after a while. Also, please stop acting like you're the all-knowing god of parenting. There is a HUGE difference between physical abuse and spanking. Spanking teaches a child that what he/she just did was wrong, it doesn't scar them for life, cause permanent damage or traumatize them.

And unfortunately for you, the world doesn't work by "your book". And it never will.

 

You can talk to a child all you want but there are those times where nothing you say gets through to them. I'm not saying you should beat the shit out of them or anything but sometimes a belt to the ass should be considered a viable option.

As far as the circumcision thing goes, my parents said they had it done to me for health concerns. I've lived without my foreskin pretty much my entire life too so I don't feel like I'm missing anything at least. It sounds annoying from what the guys that do have it are saying anyways.

I'm not gonna give them hell for doing what they thought was the best for me.

 

So, for those of you speaking about how to raise kids with spanking if needed: how many of you are parents vs. How many of you are just kids who got your own asses whooped?