Magic Vending Machine!

You get a burger king.

I insert a peanut.

 

you get a flonne
i insert you

 

You get a rift in time

I insert Rift_Patch.exe

 

You get Ragnarok Online.

I insert self.

 

You get Fles, the opposite of yourself. (Or self)

 

You get nothing.
I insert nothing.

 

You get.... EVERYTHING! 1 Item/99348871353715874 items.

I insert Speed_PatchV1.1.Exe.

 

You get Road runner.
I insert Daffy Duck;.

 

You get Acne. On your face.

I insert a gun.

 

You get some Rare Candies.
I insert Oblivion.

 

You get a castle.

I insert a key.

 

You get a door.
I insert an airship;

 

You get... HOLY CRAP! FOG!
-Airship crashes-

Sid: Are you okay?

I insert Sid.

 

You get Cid.

I insert Cid.

 

You get Cid.

I insert Cid.

Wait... What?

 

You get Seed.I insert Seed.

 

You get plant!

I insert Bacon.

 

You get Pig.

I insert Swine Flu.

 

You get AIDS.

I insert the Black Plague.

-Europeans beware!-

 

You get White Plague.

I insert Leucemia.