How to be not shy anymore?

He's obviously still a novice.

Anyway, time for some actual advice. Be awesome. Eventually you'll come to believe you were always awesome. People are always like "be yourself" but that never works unless you're me. What you've got to do is decide how you want to do things. Then do it. You must sculpt yourself into a buffet of manliness as I have.

Then you go and get yourself some perspective. Asking a girl out is easier than everyone makes it out to be. What's the worst she could do? Shoot you in the fucking kneecap? No, she won't. Stop acting like she will. You can't be crippled for life by someone saying "no". A lot of girls will be really polite and let you down easy as well if the answer is no. The few that laugh aren't worth the time so you can walk away knowing you dodged a bullet.

 

But what happens when she finds out you're someone else than yourself? Being someone else that your not has it's ups and downs. Probably when your pretending to be someone else, you will probably hate what you've become. Being someone else can hurt people badly if they figure it out. Being yourself is whats best for everyone so what if that girl likes things you don't like. You don't have to change yourself, just move on find someone else instead of pretending to be someone your not. Don't live a lie or you regret it.

 

Except yourself if you suck

 

Well no being yourself is best.

 

How big is your penis?

 

LOL! harsh

But true if you're a complete asshat.

 

WTF?

 

It's better to hate who you're not than to hate who you are, and if you don't make the effort to change I assure you it will come to pass.

People always say "be yourself" as though "self" is static. It ain't; people change all the time.

 

being yourself only works if you already have a degree of awesomeness. the important thing is to find a balance between yourself and awesome only then will you truly experience bro-lightenment.

 

I'm not saying change is bad but people change completely in a day just to get a girl who is going find out who you really are sooner or later which can lead for you and the person to seperate.

Nope you shouldn't change completely in one a day just to get someone. I'd rather be loved for who i am than for who i'm not. Thats what i believe.

 

No read suis's post, you will come to believe you're awesome and always have been.
So you will actually BE awesome.

 

You missed my point. You eventually are yourself. You're changing who that "self" is. I'm not living a lie, I'm awesome. I made myself awesome so that I wouldn't be living a lie. You could say that I've fooled myself so well into believing that I'm amazing that I have in actuality become amazing. Because if you can fool yourself, who's to say you aren't what you think you are?

Change is inherent to us. If you're going to stay the same awkward kid for years because you "want to be loved for who [you are]" then fine. Don't change, even gradually. We all have our reasons for changing or not changing. But me? Fuck that noise. I'm still me.

 

I belive that but people go to great extents just to be awesome. Believing that your awsome is all what you really need, later when you still feel that you will be awesome. You don't need to do anything special just believe that your awesome and you will become awesome.

 

That's basically what I said.

 

i know but you don't need to do anything, as time goes by you will become more confident naturally.

 

Why shouldn't someone change overnight? Why can't they have a life-changing epiphany while lying awake in bed, and why can't they have enough resolve to follow through? I'm sure I'm not the only one to do so.

Look at it this way. By constructing an alternate persona, there is disassociation with one's true self. As a result, the damage to one's self-esteem as a result of rejection is reduced if not outright negated, and that's only if rejection occurs. If either you or your persona are awesome enough, rejection won't be a problem anyway.

EDIT:

lol

 

What, so I shouldn't make it a goal to become more confident and actually work towards it? I should just sit back and wait for it? This is why people fail so hard. They don't try.

 

I suspect it's because they don't have the confidence to try to gain more confidence, which is an infinite regression. The solution? Sheer willpower. Like I originally said, man up.

 

So hiding away from people and been scared to go somewhere because the bullys go there makes you more confident naturally?
No he needs to get out there and get some confidence before he ends up a middle aged virgin that just sits indoors in internet chat rooms.

 

*checks msg's post count...*