Ask BL4CKB34RD:

Wow, Blackbeard, you're advice got me to level 33 on this game i found on the internet... i won and it said congratulations, you just won a $22million and all i had to do was put in my bank details and theyd send it me, i haven't got the money yet though :-\ And i got another question...

My friend's sister's boyfriend's brother's sister-in-law's brother's friend's mother's husband's son's friend on Romulation has an awesome thread, even the admin likes it... that's really good, i wish i made this but it wouldn't be to the same effect, well anywayz, how do you keep up the l' porotin and where did you learn to be so literate in piracy?

What's the first?

 

where do you take your answers? they're quite good

 

why do you spell my name Wolf-d'-emo-pawn when its Wolf-demon-paw & no im not emo...

 

why does he deny that he is an emo?

 

What am I doing now?

Hermmmmm. This query 'll take two swigs o' rum teh answers..... K'. I gots it. Roight nao yeh be tryin teh come ups wif a better query den. "What am I doing now?" Oi jess be sayin'.

Blackbeard, how does it feel to have the second most awesome thread on RomUlation?

Arrgh! Well, toss me a wench an call me Roger! Ye be makin' a scoundrel gets all blushy like! Oi jess be a humble bucaneer providin' a public service fer me favorite pasty lubbers.

Wow, Blackbeard, you're advice got me to level 33 on this game i found on the internet... i won and it said congratulations, you just won a $22million and all i had to do was put in my bank details and theyd send it me, i haven't got the money yet though

Well, dinae' ever ever say oi nevers helped a lubber oat. Buts yeh sent yer bank info to teh wrong bloke. Yeh gots teh send it to Punchkey Stanton. He be teh QU33N 4NN3'5 R3V3NGE's accountant. You send 'im yer bank info an' we'll gets yer check oat first ting! Poiret's honor!

And i got another question... My friend's sister's boyfriend's brother's sister-in-law's brother's friend's mother's husband's son's friend on Romulation has an awesome thread, even the admin likes it... that's really good, i wish i made this but it wouldn't be to the same effect, well anywayz, how do you keep up the l' porotin and where did you learn to be so literate in piracy?

ZOMZORS and ergh! Yes "ergh", nay "argh". "Ergh" nay be a good ting. Hao dis yeh get so goods at confusin' a bastard? An peoples say's dey have a hards toime understandin' yers truly! Oim's aboat teh goes Cameron on yehs:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=56DQneo5JNU&feature=related

where do you take your answers? they're quite good

TAKES me answers? Waits a barnacle lickin' minute! Yeh think oi be a TAKIN' me answers from somewheres?!! Dems be FOIGHTIN' wurds! T4K35 IT B4CK, says oi! Yeh kin call me a bowlegged, scurvified, pagan son of a land lubbin' pasty one bit whore, but NO ONE gets away wif callin' me a PLAGARIST! Oi may be COMPLETELY untrusworthy, a bad roll model, a tax dogin' cheat, a fillandere, a masochist, a thief, a swindler, a raider, a scalawag, a rapscallion, a hornswoggler, a monkey fisted ner' do well, I thinks yeh get teh oidea. BUT OI NAY BE A PLAGARIST!!!!!

why do you spell my name Wolf-d'-emo-pawn when its Wolf-demon-paw & no im not emo...

Poirets be known fer a wee bit' o dyslexia from toime teh toime. It comes an' goes, see. Hope oi di'nae hurts yer precious loike feelins.

why does he deny that he is an emo?

(Shush, nao. We better scale back teh emo talks or Wolfy 'll end up cuttin' himselfs agin.) Step away from teh broken glass Wolfy! Pain is nay yer friend! Step away from oblivion! Here be a dubloon. Go buys yerself a noice jug a rum and quit hack'n on yer arm dar, mate.

Cause he's emo

Aww, nao ya dun it. Se wot 'ees done? Dat ones gonna leave a scar, says oi.

 

Where do you get skills of comedy like you have sir?

 

Would you recruit guys like me, CJ, Kamage, crazytuna, Branraf & equitypetey on your ship?

 

Well i'd love to be recruited for yer ship matey. Anyways i gots another thing. My friend's best friend's brother's best friend's girlfriend's mother-in-laws step mothers sons uncle has a cute bird that likes annoying everyone, he says it's a funny thing but i am constantly hearing about him getting annoying to all these people that enter his quarters. I would love to be able to say kill it, but it's never more than a shoulder away from this guy. How do i go abouts killing it unknowingly to my friend's best friend's brother's best friend's girlfriend's mother-in-laws step mothers sons uncle? Any help would be appreciated. From the guy you know as that confusing bastard!

 

O great BL4CKB34RD I am sorry I doubted even for a second your answers, wll you accept my apologies and not slice my head off?

 

whats been your greatest conquest?

 

Where do you get skills of comedy like you have sir?

ARGHHHH! So yeh think BL4CKB34RD jess be fun n' games, aye? Well poirecy be serious bidness, guppy! Oi was so stirred up when oi firs' read yer question that I went ta port, took a couple o' me men and went ta raids yer haouse. We snuck in yer front door and was about teh wake everyone up when one o me men, Red Eye Giles, said oi may be over reactin'. So's oi went inta yer kitchen, made meself a peanuts butter san'witch and had a glass a milk. Where di' yeh keep teh rum in yer place? Fer croi'in oat loud! Cuss at me mudder an curse me soul! WERE BE TEH RUM! Anywhos, tat seemed teh calm me down. But yer gonna wanna get some more milk. That gallon in yer fridge is aboat teh expire. An' try keepin some multigrain bread around, k? An' please make rum more accessible loike.

Would you recruit guys like me, CJ, Kamage, crazytuna, Branraf & equitypetey on your ship?

Well, what be some o' yer misdeeds? Oi dinae' recruits anyones who dinae' haves a colorful type past. So oi'm ginna needs some more infermation. How many seas are yeh wanted in? How many seas are yeh NOT wanted in? What be some o' yer more reputable raids? Done any time? When, where, why? Who haves yeh served under befores? What's teh funniest way yeh ever dispatched a blighter? Yer not emos argh yeh?

Well i'd love to be recruited for yer ship matey. Anyways i gots another thing. My friend's best friend's brother's best friend's girlfriend's mother-in-laws step mothers sons uncle has a cute bird that likes annoying everyone, he says it's a funny thing but i am constantly hearing about him getting annoying to all these people that enter his quarters. I would love to be able to say kill it, but it's never more than a shoulder away from this guy. How do i go abouts killing it unknowingly to my friend's best friend's brother's best friend's girlfriend's mother-in-laws step mothers sons uncle? Any help would be appreciated. From the guy you know as that confusing bastard!

Dear confusin' bastard: Props, der, branraf. Yer poiret speak be comin' alongs noicely! Yeh still takes whoile teh get teh yer point, but as per yer query: What be the problem wif jess killing it knowingly? Oi mean everyone be hatin' teh bloody squab, roight? So jess dispatch teh bird oatright! Me first mate had parrot tat oleways whistled Backstreet Boys tunes. HATED TAT BIRD! So ois killed it an' ates it. Me cook did a roight propper job. An parrot be quite tasty. Here be the review oi wrote fer one o me favorite bird recipes tat oi reviewed on find.myrecipes.com:

http://find.myrecipes.com/recipes/recipefinder.dyn?action=showRatings&forwardAction=displayRecipe&recipe_id=523044

Or by "bird", argh ye meanin' "wench"? Cause if you're talkin' boats a wench an nay a literal bird, ten tat changes e'ry thing.

O great BL4CKB34RD I am sorry I doubted even for a second your answers, wll you accept my apologies and not slice my head off?

I kin accepts yer apology, but I'm gonna still requoire sumpin' gets cutted offs. Which do yeh use less: yer left ear or yer right pinky?

whats been your greatest conquest?

O, comes nao. Oi jess be a humble loike bucaneer an' oi nay loikes teh brag. Ole rioight, ole roight! So's oi DO loikes the brag. Well me greatest expoits be too numerous to chronicle her so I will only share one o' me lesser conquests. Tell yer cap'n really want teh be knowin' where teh OnePiece be, teh call or text yers truly. HEH, HARRRGH! Beats yeh to it Monkey D.!

 

ARGHHHH! So yeh think BL4CKB34RD jess be fun n' games, aye? Well poirecy be serious bidness, guppy! Oi was so stirred up when oi firs' read yer question that I went ta port, took a couple o' me men and went ta raids yer haouse. We snuck in yer front door and was about teh wake everyone up when one o me men, Red Eye Giles, said oi may be over reactin'. So's oi went inta yer kitchen, made meself a peanuts butter san'witch and had a glass a milk. Where di' yeh keep teh rum in yer place? Fer croi'in oat loud! Cuss at me mudder an curse me soul! WERE BE TEH RUM! Anywhos, tat seemed teh calm me down. But yer gonna wanna get some more milk. That gallon in yer fridge is aboat teh expire. An' try keepin some multigrain bread around, k? An' please make rum more accessible loike.
Oi thinks I will counter with ya own gaem, yuh be over reactin' mate! I meant tat as a compliment, dus noyt yuo complement yur men likes?
Harhar, me be a charmin' buccaneer to teh classy ladies liek, doon't mess with teh Dogger and teh shipmen of SS.Sparky! >:3

Did you not see the rum hidden under my bed?

 

Well dear ol' blackbeard, oi'll try teh recipe for me ol' cap'n. And yes i have done time, cell b6 of a special mental health institution for throwin balls o' ice at me ol' teacher. almos' kill 'im it did. It may have been for an hour but it still counts as doin' time. And i'm not wanted in the indian ocean at the moment sir. And by bird i mean not a chick bird son i mean a bird of confusingly annoying speech my dear. I gots a final question of the day. My fathers mothers sons, sons sisters grandmas grand daughters brother wants to know if 'e be suited for teh ship of his dear matey - dear ol' blackbeard.

 

I guess my pinky, hes pretty useless

 

Did you not see the rum hidden under my bed?

No's. Oi dinae go furthers den teh kitchen. Hads we know where yer rum stash be'd, we may have gonna ahead wif't eh full raid. Butts yeh know, hindsight be 20/20 n' ats least oi gots a san'witch oats o' it. But oi jess be askin': yeh gets more milk? An' also: how kin ye be drinkin' skim supreme?!! Da ya think yer fat? Cuz yer nots. Yeh could be drinkin' whole milk and ye'd be lookin' ship shape.

Nay:


Aye:




I guess my pinky, hes pretty useless

Way teh face yer reality, crazytuna. Report teh me galley then, boyo! By teh ways, deh yer pinky be tastin' loike tuna? If so, yer pinky might be a good casserole ingredient fer some o' teh cannibals on me crew.



Nom, nom, nom.

 

can you do this? [facepalm]

 

can you be a hero?

 

I can

 

Fergots teh address branraf

Well dear ol' blackbeard, oi'll try teh recipe for me ol' cap'n. And yes i have done time, cell b6 of a special mental health institution for throwin balls o' ice at me ol' teacher. almos' kill 'im it did. It may have been for an hour but it still counts as doin' time. And i'm not wanted in the indian ocean at the moment sir. And by bird i mean not a chick bird son i mean a bird of confusingly annoying speech my dear. I gots a final question of the day.

So yeh be an oice thrower, meh? Was it loike a dagger made o' oice, or jess a hard loike snow ball? An' jess hao close teh killin' teh bookish fellow? We talkin gallons o' blood alls over? Or more o' jess a nose bleeder? The insanity, oi loike. I ner trusts a mate who be all there, mentally speakin'.

My fathers mothers sons, sons sisters grandmas grand daughters brother wants to know if 'e be suited for teh ship of his dear matey - dear ol' blackbeard.

K. Oi'm actually gonna troi teh figure tis one oat:

Father's mother = yer granny
Mother's son (granny's son)= yer pappy
Son's son (pappy's son)= yer bro
Son's sister (bro's sister)= yer sissy
Sister's grandma (sissy's grandma)= back teh yer granny
Grandma's grand daughter (granny's grand daughter)= back teh yer sissy
Grand daughter's brother (sissy's brother)= either you er yer bro

So's lemme gets yeh straight: Yeh want's teh know if you or yer bro kin join me crew? Scuttle me jib, bugger me maw, an' dump me rum! Spit it out boy! Troi talkin' straight loike! I thinks yeh be hittin' teh rum even earlier ten oi teh ends up talkin' loike that mate?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tZmDWltBziM

can you do this?

Aye. Tis wot oi be doin' every toime oi reads a branraf post.





can you be a hero?

Nay. Teh hero biz be fer teh suckers. Villainy be more me skillset. Once in a whoiles oi end up bein' an "unloikely" hero, oars a "reluctant" hero. But a straights up hero? Nay. Can'ts be one. EVAR>

I can

Den proves it, bucko.

 

i want a pirate dictionary... where can i get one? XD