Well, I just did a poem for a report, and I'm just posting this up for a critique “It Matters†(A Hero’s Traits) By Kamage The past has what the present will never surrender. What matters if the sun has always risen? What matters is: The sun rises What matters if man has been glorious? What matters is: There is still Glory What matters if the world has been conquered? What matters is: The Heavens are still beyond our reach No matter what: give us not our salvation; give us nothing. We who will conquer the sun resent all charity. We proclaim our right to glory. We demand the right to create empires What matters is: What matters to man. And a man matters What a Man matters. And Man decides: what matters. Oh wait, I forgot a little something: Head Count! Use Your Head! All Hands on Deck! Take the Wheel! Pass me a Coke! What matters is: I followed the Directions.
That last part is part of the poem right? If so it doesn't sync well with the whole theme... And also I didn't really get into the first line But that's just me. Good work.
I just wanted the directions to ahve as little part of it as possible, we had to include five synechdoches, and of course I just put it at the end, and made a smart comment to my teacher "What Matters is: I followed the Directions" only because I didn't actually include the Synechdoches in the real poem
