How do YOU get a date/relationship/whatever you call it?

Yeah. Title of thread.

Don't ask me. I don't know, never been on a date or with anyone...

You guys will have to answer this question without me.

 

Whenever I turn on my DS, I'm in a relationship.

 

Oh.... :\

 

Just being myself, though...which version of myself differs, being my sad emo'y self doesnt work, being my "anti social" self is destined to fail, then there is my anti social to the MAX which is made to turn away un wanted grls before my "honest" self tells them to get lost.


Then, there is my awesome self, being cool, agreeable, and just generally being NICE, a bit of effort seeing as I prefer my "asshole" self these days, but hay, it works, I just cbf'd using it often.

So in conclusion, be yourself (more or less), if you dont have an awesome self, find someone who matches what personality you prefer to be in

 

Like I know.

Eh, I figure, when it happens, it'll happen. I'm in no hurry to enter a relationship with somebody unless I truly feel it would be worth my time. The few times this has held true, the other person didn't feel the same.

I'll just keep on truckin' and do what I need to do.

 

Yeah well that's not helpful when you're extremely lonely every single night.

Being myself doesn't work. I've had 3 date requests, but all of them were jokes. The only dude who even talked to me for actual conversation turned out to be some pervert dude who would probably end up raping me if we somehow ended up alone together.

 

I know this is different for everybody, but don't think of it as being alone, or even think of it as a bad thing if you must think about it. Believe it or not, many guys wait for the girl to make the first move, while girls just kind of expect the guy to make the first move as per custom.

If you really want a relationship, find guys your interested in, and just sorta be outright with it. Don't beat around the bush.

 

Most sober men do not initiate conversation with the opposite sex, so go out, get a little tipsy, and try and get some numbers. Do this a couple times, and then start calling dudes in the order you met them. If they're keen you can tell in the first 10 seconds.

 

A stab at an actual answer then.

I was in a couple of r/s a few years ago. I usually 'get them' by yes, mirroring them. I've been imitating people's personality ever since I was a kid, so that's how I work with guys too. If he's a srzbznz, global-debate, Type A guy - I mirror him. If he's a fast life, let's take it a day at a time kind, I mirror that too. Like attracts like, so it always works without fail. Stick-in the-muds like sticks-in-the-mud.

Everything down to speech patterns, habits, actions, slangs...You get the idea. Not that I do it consciously. Like I've said, I don't think I even have a personality that can't be attributed to someone around me.

You get the guy this way. Whether you can keep him though, is another question. As for dates? I don't know. Why would I ask anyone out? //Mindblown.

 

Been doing that for the past....I dunno... 4, 5 years. Never found any guys at all. None. Zilch.

Uh..... I can't do that. That's beyond me. I've got my personality, and I can't deviate. I don't know why. I've tried, but I can't.

 

...yeah that happens, but you only had 3, and you are alot younger than me, I've had 2, eww to both (can't stand stupid ugly smokers, and yes, they were stupid, ugly and smokers >_> )

Dating is like fishing, it's luck and chance, ethier keep waiting...or start picking up those you think would be better.

Surely there is one guy that you hang with often that you call a good friend who isnt gay?

 

If you can't express interest in the guy, how do you expect them to express enough interest in you to ask you out and build a relationship?

Relationships are a two way street. One person can't do all the work.

 

You don't necessarily need a guy though. I find a soulmate/best friend does pretty much the same thing for me.

Minus the penis. But screw penises.

Then just wait it out until some guy comes around that's all sparkly and shit.

 

Nope. That was the only guy. I literally have never had any guy friends in RL (that one guy I mentioned wasn't even really my friend, we just chatted sometimes). None. On MSN, 90% of my contacts are guys, but that's MSN. I don't even know anyone in RL that I've met on MSN.

Can't even find regular ol' friends. I've only ever had a best friend once, for like 3-4 months in 3rd grade, but then she moved and we never saw each other again.

Other than that, I've had like 3 friends... All in high school, not all at once, and they all moved away and we never spoke to each other again. ;_;

 

D:
This sounds dire. There must be something that causes this. Do you stay at home a lot? Don't talk to people? Have job with few colleagues? You could try asking acquaintances to hook you up. You never know, you might bump into someone nice.

 

So, you too are the anti social type?

Much the same here, just gender swap, and yea...I found I can get close enough to a few girls online...

Sadly, if I tried to go indepth with them, it means I have to get a plane ticket if i ever hope to meet them physically DX


My advice, just blow thru life, studies or whatever, and see how you go, sure it'll seem lonly for a few years but wether online or in real life (if you take further studies maybe you'll meet some classmates) you just never really know.

If you're really desperate there are those dating sites, use the free ones, you shouldn't have to pay for something that may not work

If she's on the computer alot that may be the cause...I know my gaming (and the fact it's become an addiction) has just about crushed all social interractions except to a small few who know how to get me out (it involves food XD)

 

I? I just say "you, me, now".

You, on the other hand, have anxieties and preconceptions you've gotta get over first. I can see you want something "meaningful" (lol young love), but your soulmate ain't just gonna appear out of the blue and introduce himself.

If you want my brand of self-help, hit me up on Chatango or IRC. Otherwise, I'll just suggest that you try meeting up with internet friends and going from there.

 

I stay home all the time, I don't talk to people (too awkward), I don't have a job (sent a job application to the store down the street, haven't had any calls yet so I must not be hired), and I don't know anyone (I don't talk to people I don't know. Not because my mom taught me not to as a kid, but because strangers are fucking scary as hell). And I don't like being hooked up. Someone already tried that for me and hooked me up with some dude I never met in person who ended up going to jail for accidental arson and breaking and entering.

I don't like meeting people, because I don't know them. :<

And I may be desperate, but I'm not THAT desperate. Dating sites are stupid.

:\ I've been on the computer since I woke up at 1pm, and it's 2am. I'm on A LOT. It's not the computer that's crushed all my social interaction, it's the fact that social interaction requires you to be at least 1% social. I'm not anti-social... I'm just not social. :< And there's no way to get me out, either.

:\ Can't. My mom won't let me, and since I can't drive, that's the final answer.

 

Public transport?

 

All we have here are school buses. Public buses are..... About an hour or two away.